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Submitted on
June 27, 2010



Birthday - Reflecting + PenPal Organising

Journal Entry: Sun Jun 27, 2010, 10:30 PM
* My Gallery * * Commissions *


Kiriban: 150,000 pageviews (Only the first person to send me a screenshot of that EXACT pageview will get a request drawing from me, up to three characters. Only that exact number counts, not one or two pageviews more or less. Also, if more than one person catches the kiriban, the first one to send me a note will get the request drawing.)

Birthday - Reflecting

My birthday gift to my watchers: :thumb168827251:

I got a wonderful gift from :iconsawai159: : Happy B-day silver-eyes-blue by sawai159 and also one from :iconblack-umi:. Thank you! :heart:

Oh, and I started a donation campaign for a new subscription. ^^ Every single point will be welcome!


So, I turned 23 today. Gosh, I sure don't feel like 23. Nor do I look like it. Or act that way. XD

When I look back, I remember that when I was 18 I had totally different plans for what I wanted to be doing and where I wanted to be when I am 23. Seeing that, it makes me realize just how impulsive I am. Depending on my emotions, sometimes I do what feels right in that very moment, not thinking about long-term consequences. I throw away everything I had been working for just because it suddenly stopped feeling right.

My Politics and German teacher keeps saying that this is wonderful in a way, as it destroys the scheme according to which we all are forced to live, in which everything is planned and in which there is a moment for everything, but he also concluded that I am completely insane. I think he's right. I often wonder what kind of psychological problems one would diagnose if I went to see a psychologist again, lol.

Then again, I don't think I want to know. Chronic depression is enough.

In the last year, I discovered that I believe in angels. I discovered that there is some part of me or even some higher force trying to make a statement by sending me really weird dreams. I learned about an archangel I didn't know existed. Hanael. Hm. I said that name so many times in my dreams in the past weeks.

The past year also brought some new friends. And it has proven me that I can be the best student in the whole school even if I go to school in a country where they speak a language which is not my mother tongue. It also made me realized that I am probably wasting all my talent here, but oh well.

The past few months made me appreciate my right arm/hand more. Mostly because I have been unable to use it properly. They have also taught me to live with constant pain.

I learned that sometimes we don't know people as well as we think we do. I learned that men are vulnerable too and that they also tend to be silly when they are afraid of losing the ones they love. I also learned that some of them are just as confused about their emotions as we girls sometimes are.

I learned that I hate the life, but also don't want to give it away. I learned that I am unable to be truly happy. And this... this made me laugh.

The past year was emotionally very difficult for me. But it is over now. I wonder what the next one will bring. I don't like the number 23, not as much as 22. But maybe that is a good omen.

PenPal Organising

:iconladyusagi: is trying to organise some penpals from various countries! So if you'd like to exchange letters with someone, or simply want more info, do check out her journal:…

Clubs and Groups

Owner of:
Heavenly Princess stamp by Ryoko-san18

A proud member of:
:icontheodangoclub: :icontakeuchi-senshi: :iconsailormoon: :iconriniclub: :iconsailor-moon-club: :iconsailorsaturn-club: :iconliveactionsailormoon: :iconsailorcosmosclub: :iconsm-club: :iconusa-chan-club: :iconsm-fanatic-club: :iconkawaii-hunters: :iconqueen-serenity-club: :iconcolorful-art: :iconsenshilove: :iconunseenartists: :iconanime-manga-artists: :iconharuka-michiru-love: :iconbssm-club: :iconeternalcrystaltokyo: :iconmoonprincessesclub: :iconalteregomanga: :iconheaven-ly: :iconbest-of-sailor-moon:

Basic CSS code is by Thiefoworld
Adaptation by silver-eyes-blue
  • Listening to: Memories - David Guetta feat. Kid Cudi
  • Playing: The Sims 3
  • Eating: crackers
  • Drinking: water
Add a Comment:
The-Rainbow-Faerie Featured By Owner Jul 10, 2010   General Artist
I hope this new year brings you more relaxtion and happiness to make up for the last few months. =)
kimlasca Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2010  Student Traditional Artist
:hug: Happy birthday!
silver-eyes-blue Featured By Owner Jun 29, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you ^^
kimlasca Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2010  Student Traditional Artist
Roselite Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
I remember when I turned 23... it was June 4th of this year...

Anyway, happy birthday Silver!
silver-eyes-blue Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Awww, then happy belated birthday. ^^ It is still June. ;)
VoltronZ1 Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2010  Student Writer
Happy Birthday my friend. May you have the best Birthday of your life.

I'm sorry if I couldn't make a gift in time, so here's a song for you instead. [link]
silver-eyes-blue Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Awwww, thank you. ^^ I adore that song. ^^ It calms me down somehow.
Paprika-Studios Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2010  Hobbyist Digital Artist
:hug: First of all, Happy Birthday! I hope year 23 turns out to be a better year for you.

You are very talented in many areas to the point where you are inspiration. When I heard about the complications with your arm and the fact that you were still produing art in ways, showed that you are a very dedicated person as well as an inspiring person as well. I am still amazed and memorized at your water colours of both your previous and newer works. Plus, to know that you live in a country that speaks a different lanuage than your native tongue as well as type in yet a different language here on Deviantart is amazing to me. I may be from American (where learning a secondary language is a feat in itself) but I have taken classes outside of schooling to learn a second lanuage but I get very frustrated and its not the fact that I find it hard; it was just with the point that I was born with dyslexia.

So to me, you're an amazing person as well as a very talented person. I am very glad that I wandered acrossed your art two years ago.
silver-eyes-blue Featured By Owner Jun 28, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
Awwww, thank you. :hug: And don't be discouraged by dyslexia, we all have our problems which make things difficult for us. I suppose that without them, life would be too easy. :P
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